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Monday, July 18, 2011
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Children & Divorce: Overcoming Challenges & Succeeding in Life
Divorce is a major stressful event for children and adults. To children, divorce is confusing. They have so many concerns and questions about how their lives will change. They cannot control what is happening to their family, and they often think that they are responsible for their parents divorce. Strong emotions are experienced such as hurt and anger.
For adults and children, divorce is an adjustment that takes time. It is more difficult for some than others, depending on a number of factors. Conflict between parents creates more stress and difficulty for children of divorce. Support from family and friends has a significant impact on coping. Children with little support tend to feel more insecure and worried than children with a good support system.
Signs of difficulty adjusting and accepting divorce are most evident in children’s behavior. There will be changes in their normal patterns, such as irritability and angry outbursts. Some children will become more withdrawn and lose interest in activities they once enjoyed. Academic problems can also develop as a result of changes in behavior. Children experiencing depression may have difficulty focusing on their schoolwork. Aggressive behavior in children can cause problems with teachers and peers. Overall effort and motivation can wane. For this reason, it is extremely important for children of divorce to get the support and help they need to make healthy adjustments and improve coping.
Research shows that children of divorce are at higher risk for:
• academic problems
• aggressive behavior
• drug experimentation and use
• sexual activity
• relationship problems
• low self-esteem
• depression
Parents and teachers often underestimate the difficulties children of divorce face. There are many behavioral signs as listed below. Most children of divorce will experience some of these symptoms.
• regressive behavior in young children: whining, clinging, returning to security blanket, toilet training problems, thumb sucking
• sleeping problems
• fears, insecurities, worries
• withdrawal, isolation, unusually quiet
• disobedient, disrespectful to parents and authority
• aggressive, violent, or destructive behaviors
• anger, resentment, embarrassment about divorce
• physical symptoms: aches and pains, stomach problems, headaches
• academic problems: focus, truancy, declining grades, tardiness, missing assignments
Although children of divorce are at a higher risk for many problems, they can make healthy adjustments and develop a strong support system. They can begin to understand divorce and not fear its consequences. They can gain peace of mind as they learn that although life will be different, life can be good. Divorce is not the end of the world but the beginning of a new life. Children can learn how to manage their feelings and accept the challenges and new responsibilities they will have. Focus and motivation can be restored, and they can face life with greater strength and hope.
Children need support and help as they deal with the many challenges of divorce. The stress, confusion, and behavioral problems can be significantly reduced with proper and healthy intervention. Many future problems can also be prevented. Children can make a positive transition with children therapy. For children, divorce counseling can provide a strong and safe support system to help them adjust and cope. Children therapy can help them work through their many emotions, release their fears and anger, keep focused and perform their best in school, and maintain good relationships with their parents, siblings, peers, and teachers.
Divorce does not have to lead children down a dark, difficult, destructive path. Children are resilient. They can understand and adjust well. They can learn healthy ways to cope and overcome challenges. They can have peace in the midst of the storm, and love can be their anchor. Children of divorce can develop greater compassion, deeper insight, understanding and wisdom from their experience. They can become stronger and more determined as they withstand the tempest winds and tumultuous seas that threaten to overcome them. Children of divorce can and will succeed with help and support.
Copyright © 2009 All Rights Reserved. written by Krystal Kuehn, MA, LPC, LLP, NCC
Co-founder of New Day Counseling Services and BeHappy4Life.com
Krystal Kuehn, MA, LPC, LLP, NCC is a licensed professional counselor, author, teacher, and musician. She specializes in helping people live their best life now, reach their full potential, overcome barriers, heal from their past, and develop a lifestyle of health, happiness, and love. Krystal is the cofounder of New Day Counseling Services, providers of adolescent and children therapy and BeHappy4Life.com, an award-winning self-help and personal growth site where you can find hundreds of free resources, insights, and inspiration.
For adults and children, divorce is an adjustment that takes time. It is more difficult for some than others, depending on a number of factors. Conflict between parents creates more stress and difficulty for children of divorce. Support from family and friends has a significant impact on coping. Children with little support tend to feel more insecure and worried than children with a good support system.
Signs of difficulty adjusting and accepting divorce are most evident in children’s behavior. There will be changes in their normal patterns, such as irritability and angry outbursts. Some children will become more withdrawn and lose interest in activities they once enjoyed. Academic problems can also develop as a result of changes in behavior. Children experiencing depression may have difficulty focusing on their schoolwork. Aggressive behavior in children can cause problems with teachers and peers. Overall effort and motivation can wane. For this reason, it is extremely important for children of divorce to get the support and help they need to make healthy adjustments and improve coping.
Research shows that children of divorce are at higher risk for:
• academic problems
• aggressive behavior
• drug experimentation and use
• sexual activity
• relationship problems
• low self-esteem
• depression
Parents and teachers often underestimate the difficulties children of divorce face. There are many behavioral signs as listed below. Most children of divorce will experience some of these symptoms.
• regressive behavior in young children: whining, clinging, returning to security blanket, toilet training problems, thumb sucking
• sleeping problems
• fears, insecurities, worries
• withdrawal, isolation, unusually quiet
• disobedient, disrespectful to parents and authority
• aggressive, violent, or destructive behaviors
• anger, resentment, embarrassment about divorce
• physical symptoms: aches and pains, stomach problems, headaches
• academic problems: focus, truancy, declining grades, tardiness, missing assignments
Although children of divorce are at a higher risk for many problems, they can make healthy adjustments and develop a strong support system. They can begin to understand divorce and not fear its consequences. They can gain peace of mind as they learn that although life will be different, life can be good. Divorce is not the end of the world but the beginning of a new life. Children can learn how to manage their feelings and accept the challenges and new responsibilities they will have. Focus and motivation can be restored, and they can face life with greater strength and hope.
Children need support and help as they deal with the many challenges of divorce. The stress, confusion, and behavioral problems can be significantly reduced with proper and healthy intervention. Many future problems can also be prevented. Children can make a positive transition with children therapy. For children, divorce counseling can provide a strong and safe support system to help them adjust and cope. Children therapy can help them work through their many emotions, release their fears and anger, keep focused and perform their best in school, and maintain good relationships with their parents, siblings, peers, and teachers.
Divorce does not have to lead children down a dark, difficult, destructive path. Children are resilient. They can understand and adjust well. They can learn healthy ways to cope and overcome challenges. They can have peace in the midst of the storm, and love can be their anchor. Children of divorce can develop greater compassion, deeper insight, understanding and wisdom from their experience. They can become stronger and more determined as they withstand the tempest winds and tumultuous seas that threaten to overcome them. Children of divorce can and will succeed with help and support.
Copyright © 2009 All Rights Reserved. written by Krystal Kuehn, MA, LPC, LLP, NCC
Co-founder of New Day Counseling Services and BeHappy4Life.com
Krystal Kuehn, MA, LPC, LLP, NCC is a licensed professional counselor, author, teacher, and musician. She specializes in helping people live their best life now, reach their full potential, overcome barriers, heal from their past, and develop a lifestyle of health, happiness, and love. Krystal is the cofounder of New Day Counseling Services, providers of adolescent and children therapy and BeHappy4Life.com, an award-winning self-help and personal growth site where you can find hundreds of free resources, insights, and inspiration.
Friday, November 20, 2009
Marriage Family Counseling - Keeping Marriages Strong & Families Together
Good marriages are foundational to happy and healthy families. Keeping marriages strong and working through challenges successfully can help a family thrive. Marriages are constantly faced with challenges today. Whether it is communication problems, infidelity, parenting, substance abuse, or loss of a family member, marriage family counseling has many benefits. Not only does marriage family counseling help in working through problems, it enhances relationships and opens up lines of communication. One of the most common complaints of couples is that they do not feel heard or understood by their partners. A marriage family therapist can help couples and family members communicate in such a way that they can understand, accept, and respect one another’s perspective. They can begin to feel safe in sharing their feelings and thoughts. They can draw closer than they imagined possible.
Marriage family counseling also reduces the chance of problems becoming worse, and relationships drifting, becoming damaged, or marriages ending in divorce. Research has found that professional counseling improves relationships and the physical and mental health of all family members is significantly improved.
Marriage family counseling has many benefits to those who want to build strong, healthy, and happy marriages. Great relationships do not just happen. There is investment involved, that is, investment of time, effort, and sacrifice. Some of the most successful marriages and closest, happiest families are those that have undergone some of the most difficult times and committed to work on them together.
Getting help to improve or save a marriage is one of the wisest, most loving things a couple can do for their own well-being, for their children and families, and for their future. No marriage or family need suffer from the pressures of unresolved problems that lead to even bigger problems. Help is available and it can make a difference for life!
Copyright © 2009 New Day Counseling Services
written by Krystal Kuehn, MA, LPC, LLP, NCC
Chains do not hold a marriage together. It is threads, hundreds of tiny threads which sew people together through the years. ~Simone Signoret
Coming together is a beginning, staying together is progress, and working together is success. ~Henry Ford
Marriage family counseling also reduces the chance of problems becoming worse, and relationships drifting, becoming damaged, or marriages ending in divorce. Research has found that professional counseling improves relationships and the physical and mental health of all family members is significantly improved.
Marriage family counseling has many benefits to those who want to build strong, healthy, and happy marriages. Great relationships do not just happen. There is investment involved, that is, investment of time, effort, and sacrifice. Some of the most successful marriages and closest, happiest families are those that have undergone some of the most difficult times and committed to work on them together.
Getting help to improve or save a marriage is one of the wisest, most loving things a couple can do for their own well-being, for their children and families, and for their future. No marriage or family need suffer from the pressures of unresolved problems that lead to even bigger problems. Help is available and it can make a difference for life!
Copyright © 2009 New Day Counseling Services
written by Krystal Kuehn, MA, LPC, LLP, NCC
Chains do not hold a marriage together. It is threads, hundreds of tiny threads which sew people together through the years. ~Simone Signoret
Coming together is a beginning, staying together is progress, and working together is success. ~Henry Ford
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
Divorce Counseling: Getting Through Divorce with Hope
No one gets married thinking they will get divorced some day. Most people have goals and dreams of being together forever, raising a family, and sharing life for better or for worse. They plan on being a team, growing together, and supporting one another. But somewhere along the line, they hit bumps in the road. They come up against walls, floods, and storms. Their marriage is put to the test. They are challenged to work together on successfully making it through problems and restoring their relationship. But this doesn’t always happen. Sometimes one partner abandons the relationship and will not return. Or, there is abuse that destroys all love and respect. Whatever the reason, divorce happens.
Divorce is not an easy option. Rather, it is a very difficult and painful one. Sometimes it seems to be the best option or the healthiest one. Divorce changes lives forever. Its pain is deep and its loss is great. To get through it is a grieving process. There are emotions of anger, guilt, worry, and denial that are normal and part of the healing process. Accepting these feelings and talking to someone who cares and understands can help in making a healthy adjustment. It takes time to adjust to the many changes that you will face. You may have to adjust to changes in your housing, family finances, holidays and celebrations, and family traditions to name just a few.
Although divorce marks the end of a marriage, it is the beginning of a new life for you. The consequences and challenges can be faced with courage, hope, and peace. Divorce counseling can help you through the healing process. Divorce counseling can provide the support and guidance you need to make a healthy adjustment during this difficult time. You can enter this new phase of life with confidence. It does not have to destroy you. You can be free of guilt, fear, and shame. You can dream new dreams. You can embrace life and truly live and love again. You can be whole and happy. You can learn and become better. You can rise up in strength and see your best days ahead of you.
Copyright © 2009 All Rights Reserved. NewDayCounseling.org
Providing Divorce Counseling services in the Metro Detroit Area; Troy, Michigan
Divorce is not an easy option. Rather, it is a very difficult and painful one. Sometimes it seems to be the best option or the healthiest one. Divorce changes lives forever. Its pain is deep and its loss is great. To get through it is a grieving process. There are emotions of anger, guilt, worry, and denial that are normal and part of the healing process. Accepting these feelings and talking to someone who cares and understands can help in making a healthy adjustment. It takes time to adjust to the many changes that you will face. You may have to adjust to changes in your housing, family finances, holidays and celebrations, and family traditions to name just a few.
Although divorce marks the end of a marriage, it is the beginning of a new life for you. The consequences and challenges can be faced with courage, hope, and peace. Divorce counseling can help you through the healing process. Divorce counseling can provide the support and guidance you need to make a healthy adjustment during this difficult time. You can enter this new phase of life with confidence. It does not have to destroy you. You can be free of guilt, fear, and shame. You can dream new dreams. You can embrace life and truly live and love again. You can be whole and happy. You can learn and become better. You can rise up in strength and see your best days ahead of you.
Copyright © 2009 All Rights Reserved. NewDayCounseling.org
Providing Divorce Counseling services in the Metro Detroit Area; Troy, Michigan
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